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aka Little Drummer Boy, aka The Real Drum Nazi Bai Xiao Hu. He who guards the gate and bangs the big drum. He who lives on Mount Crumpet, overlooking his serfs in Huville. Erstwhile filler of tiki torches, and author of the definitive work, "How to Fill Tiki Torches". Creator of the "Bai Xiao Hu Groove". Founder and reluctant leader of the Wulf Den Drum Corps, HooAh!! Don't eat his quail eggs. |
aka Fire Witch Druid priestess and general mischief-maker of the Clan. Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder... and makes Emer forget what time it is. Inheritor of Lilith's skull and crossbones- and takes the duty seriously. Gleefully fanned the flames of the Bridge Incident. Considering where she was carrying that dagger, it's lucky she didn't wind up, um, "lopsided"... |
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aka Old Dad, aka The Grand Poo-Bah The Big Hairy Russian. You'll recognize him by his big goofy grin. Parties like he just got out of jail. Maaaaaaaa... Pass the crab comb, please. It ain't a party 'till he's passed out in the weeds... or his truck. With his pants off. Don't ask, it's disturbing to us, too. |
aka Cowboy/Vinnie/Vickie/Das Racoon/MacGuyver/The Bad Cub Clan criminal and ejectee. Don't even ASK what lives in his loincloth. "No, Vincent is not in camp. No I don't know when he'll be back. No you can't sleep under the tree 'till he gets here". Parties during the first week of war are not authorized, don't let him tell you different. Put out them damn candles before you burn the tent down!! Lord of the (Stinky) Burning Chair- honestly, Faelchon tried to save it... |
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aka Nick, aka King of the Pallets Nicholas isn't much of a talker, but most people think that's because his vocabulary is limited to "beer" and "Shut up, Snax!". Official babysitter of Snax. Terror of Fire Marshals everywhere. |
aka Snax Anybody seen my boots? Self appointed fool of the Clan... and does it VERY well. Battler of the Orange Space Monkeys. Drinker of beer. LOTS of beer. Writer (and singer) of songs. "Snax, will you SHUT UP!!". |
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aka Freaky Tiereaky/The Porkmeister and Merewyn the Lucky Clamzo me boys, Clamzo! Tariq- Brewer of beer, roaster of pork butt, scolder of bad Wolf puppies. The length of that damn "Reuben Clamzo" song is tied directly to his alcohol consumption for the evening. Merewyn- Cleanest of the sh*t sisters... she's called "lucky" for a reason. |
aka Camp Mom "Hey Anya, who's on ya?" Wicked with a bow. Go ahead, run. You'll just die tired. "Anyone seen Anya?" "No, but her tent's still here". Did someone say sweaty thighs? Responsible for the midnight "pee-pee dance" assault on Raffe (don't worry, he got even...). Burner of chairs (other peoples chairs...). Washer of clothes. Breaker of the wind. Altogether a most delicate flower. |
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aka Onald/Fire Boy/Lawn Boy/The Luckiest Man in the World One of the reasons for the "no more than two-to-a-shower" rule. Proven to be a direct cause of the Bridge Battle Incident. Like Tavis, uses his powers for evil and is quite unrepentant. "It wasn't my fault! I was just SITTING there!". Want to see Donal run? Just start filling the moat... |
aka Maevy Goodness and Newbie/Velcro/Voltron/Hey You, etc. Amongst their own mundane crowd of systems analysts, they're probably considered pretty weird... Maeve- Sister of Emer... so Emer can't blame her own behavior on genetics. Valkor- Hey, what can I say, he set up the server space and domain name for this web site... NICE newbie... GOOD newbie... |
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aka Boda Man/The Once and Future Bog King "Chocolate Milk? Strong and Fruity?" Don't bother trying to find out what he puts in the bodas, just drink it and shut up. Treats volunteerism like an Olympic sport. Belly dancer extraordinaire. Along with Viktor and Anya, one of Pennsic's confirmed social butterflies. We really have no idea why he seems to like hanging out with us, but suspect that he may be over indulging on the "chocolate milk", if ya know what I mean. |
aka Tav/Long Sack and Queen of the Spinach Pies Tavis- Despite all encouragement, insists upon using his powers for evil. However, the moral annihilation of the occasional small village or hamlet is a small price to keep him amused and out of our hair. Has an aversion to short Irishmen named Sean. Cara- Bringer of meat and spinach pies. For the love of God, keep her away from axes and bed frames. Requires about one can of beer to get her in the moat. |
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aka Lil' Ho/The Drum Snob/Lil the Pregnant and Finder of the Moss Rock Lilith- Be warned... The skull and crossbones outside her tent are NOT just for show. Okay, well NOW they are... "Drum with me, Wren!" Doesn't like to drum in crowds, but that's only because she's better than most of them. "I'm getting cranky!!" Would know more rhythms than 5 drummers put together... if she could only read her notes. Scarab- Like an ant, can lift ten times his own body weight. Carrier of the Hummous. I'd make fun of him, but he just bought a bow, and well, Anya's a good teacher... |
aka Maneater/Mared the Pickled Gleeful participant in the Bridge Incident. "Are ya UP?". Maker of that pear stuff that no one can pronounce. "DITCH!!" "HOLE!!" Lifetime member of the Pennsic Puddle Jumpers, President Snax presiding. |
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aka Hirimata/Weix/Thornin/Prince/Perfect Tommy/The Compulsive Well, excessive abuse wouldn't be fair, since he ain't around to defend himself... but we think he moved to Texas because the sheep are less prone to gossip. Brother, son, cousin, neighbor, postal address, IRS tax file, permanent fixture on the "Help Stop Gonorrhea" mailing list. Claims to be a landscaper. In Texas. Ah, yeah. Arranging tumbleweed and cactus? Dingo lawn art, perhaps? Oh well. Looks better than "male prostitute" on a resumé... |
aka Falcoon/Cheif-tok-tok-tain and Wren-T-Liquored/Wee Wren of the Mud Folk Faelchon- Brave, wise, handsome, infinitely patient. Under his expert hand a bunch of ingrates and degenerates are formed into a cohesive group of campers... (Hey, I'm the one writing this trash... what did you expect??) Wren- The Crown Princess of Pain. "Oh, I've got chiggers!" Armed with only a flashlight, transforms into the perfect Pennsic buzz-kill. Veteran moat wrestler- It only looked like she was trying to strangle Donal. The other half of the Siamese Chair-Burning Twins. |
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aka Waterboy/The Dragonlord/ Are you fascinated by dragons? Like tattoos? Are you a female with large *ahem* "assets"? Well, you'll have to get through Anya first (she's mean, and fights dirty), but then you'll have a great time with this prime hunk of |